Sonnet 12
Bloody torrents grind between my ears,
screeching, throbbing. Fingers itch to break
and writhe in freedom. Seconds sire years
and sweat crawls over naked pulse-headache.
A door yawns open. Gasps of shadow-breath
sigh over me and faintly hiss my name.
“A prize awaits…” They coax me to their nest,
yet I’m alert to lurking guilt and shame
once darkness soaks my brain in inky black
and swelling shadows swallow up my eyes…!
I wake from doom-trance; I must turn my back
and free my will from illusory lies…
But feel the pressure freeze! It binds me fast—
O power this temptation has amassed!
The Drive Home
I watch the dotted line
and imagine “cut here” scissors.
If we could peel the world
like a Twizzler
and reduce the universe
to this single black string…
maybe then,
we could find the not.
But as it is,
we are surrounded by
white or red lightning
and Doppler thunder.
You’re distracted
and swearing at steel clouds.
Only yesterday, you whispered
“honey” to my flower ears,
where buzzing heartbeats lifted it
to a pulsing hive.
I taste, and thankfully,
it holds its sweetness.
If I ask
the same question,
I’ll get
the same answer.
Sometimes I think I know you better
than you know yourself,
but neither of us know you tonight.
So,
I let the scissors cut
and drink from stores of sugar.
I’ll just wait out the storm.
Change of Heart
I feel… afraid.
Afraid of change.
Change of heart…
But I remember what it was like,
I know that it’s my choice alone,
and truly, it’s nothing I need to fear.
Mostly, I’m afraid of letting things get easy,
letting things slip.
I don’t want to take anything for granted…
But life can’t always be like the happy little vision I have in my head,
can it?
Not every moment can be so exciting.
Some are dull,
some are annoying,
some are absolutely infuriating.
It’s part of the package.
And I love this package.
It feels like a test,
from God
or fate
or our own design,
maybe even the devil.
Wherever it comes from.
It’s a reminder.
It’s here as a numb equalizer -
to create a lull in the excitement
so that when it starts again
it’ll be fresh and new.
The rush will come back,
won’t it?
Oh, I hope so.
But I suppose I could live without it.
If I had to.
I’ve already made a promise.
I will keep it.
So,
I suppose I’m just sleepy.
Eden
Imagine places beautiful and free,
reflected in the mirror-doors of art.
Those places have been made for you and me.
Reality exacts a heavy fee
on love; its jealous fingers tear apart.
Imagine places permanently free.
A blinded world cannot be made to see
what we have built, so come, and let’s depart
to planets that were made for you and me
and I will be your Adam; you, my Eve.
Together in this garden, we’ll restart.
Imagine places natural and free.
Alone but never lonely we will be,
sharing our sweet fruit and beating hearts
in places that were meant for you and me.
And even when the human race believes
reality’s dark dirges, we’ll be smart,
imagining our world so bright and free—
the only place accepting you and me.
Sonnet 11
A seed is laid in desolate heart-soil
and rained upon with gentle, perfumed drops,
caressed with breezy whispers, fed with oil
and honey wild. Then come the sprouting tops
so new and verdant, fingers reaching high
for breath immaculate and sunshine clean
while roots press deep, away from azure sky
through blinded earth, all sideways and between
themselves, a spider web of certainty.
Discovering hydration locked below
while sunlight smiles and time with patience leads
along a perfect path, the flower grows.
The sanguine petals span to catch the sun.
Another seed has grown; a love begun.
Dark Drops
You turn from my hello.
I watch your spine.
A drop of darkness.
I wait for you, too long.
A blue fire carries me to sleep.
A drop of darkness.
I see her hanging on you – a parasite.
You like your blood being sucked away.
A drop of darkness.
I learn sideways what you have done.
As you pass, you smile.
A drop of darkness.
I finally ask about the past.
You deny all feeling.
A drop of darkness.
Your facade falls and you come clean.
Words buzz my ears and itch my skin.
A drop of darkness.
At last,
I learn the truth about forever.
But
when it all comes to light,
these dark drops I’ve collected
are enough to blot it out.
My eyes stay dry.
I turn from your goodbye.
You watch my spine.
My cup is full.
